Ok there are two letters here. One that was given to my parents & another that was given to my secondary family.

Parents:

Dear Mom and Dad,

You know that I respect and love you both. I feel that I should give you this information. I am aware that this must all be challenging for you and difficult to accept. I understand that. It has been difficult for me to make these decisions as well knowing that I may be chastised for them. So please bear with me as I share this information.

1. My new name is Tammy and that is what I would like to be called. Yes I am sure. I have given this tremendous thought, however you can continue to call me (male name removed) in a work environment and around your friends until I have completed my transition.

2. As I continue with my treatment you may notice that my body is changing. I will make every effort to avoid embarrassment at work for both you and me. However, please realize that whatever is under my clothing is my business and not yours.

3. I do not expect you to run out and tell the world about me, nor do I want that. But please don't treat this as a huge secret. It happens. I am gender dysphoric, I have chosen a different path but I am still the same soul I was before.

4. Please realize that what I do in my personal life is my business and mine alone.

5. I will do my best to respect you and I expect the same in return. Hopefully, we can continue our relationship based on respecting each other's privacy and showing our concern for each other's well being.

I feel that within the next year I need to move to Portland to finish my transition. I also would like to be living full time as a female by the time I am 28 or 29. I also hope to find a life partner there and may possibly end up living the rest of my life there. Boise and I have reached a point that I am falling apart at the seams. Boise is great and all but it’s just not the kind of place I can live out my life and feel safe. I would rather have you join me in my journey and help me rather than go against me. Please consider this. It’s for the best.

Three (3) months from the conclusion of this meeting a letter will be mailed out to all the secondary family. You may tell anyone you would like to tell before this time that you would like to find out from yourselves instead of the letter. This time limit is not subject to negotiation. A copy of this letter is available if you would like to see it.

Sincerely,

Tammy (last name removed)

Secondary Family:

Dear ______

First, I would like to say that this is an extremely hard letter to write to all of you. You all have supported me throughout my entire life. I respect all of you and will do my best to continue to respect you and hope you can continue to treat me with the same respect as well.

I cannot continue to live a lie any further. It has been extremely hard to live a lie every day for the last 26 years. For my entire life I have dealt with extreme depression, anxiety etc. I must tell you all that I have never felt comfortable in a male body. You may be wondering why I am telling you this. I plan to live out the rest of my life as a female. You see I was born transgendered. It simply means I am a woman that was born in a man’s body. It doesn’t mean that I’m a freak or some weird person. I will still be the same loving, caring person that I have been throughout my life. I would like you to understand that this is something I HAVE to do to be happy with myself. I have been undergoing hormone replacement therapy for the last 8 months. Essentially that means I am taking the first step to becoming a woman. I would like to ask that in the future you call me Tammy instead of (male name removed). I also would like to ask that in the future when referring to me please call me she instead of he.

I know some of you may have some doubts and think I am crazy at this point. I have Gender Identity Disorder or Gender Dysphoria, and YES I AM SURE!

I know some of this may be very difficult for you to accept. I will leave it up to you to tell your children.

I would like to state one last time in this letter that I will continue to treat you with the same respect I have always shown you and I hope you continue to do the same with me. Please also realize that I will still be the same person inside that I always have been, I will just have a different appearance on the outside. I need to stress that I know this may be very hard for you to hear. Please realize that this is a very hard thing for me to tell you all. I also need to ask that you don’t just sweep me under the rug and write me out of your lives. You all are very important to me.

Sincerely,

Tammy (last name removed)

Submitted by Tammy (12/18/2007)

Note: This page was archived and merged from TSSupport.org.

Categories: ComingOut Letters TSSupport